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Inside a Dallas Cowboys Practice

December 27, 2008

It’s well known that Coach Wade Philips runs one of the tightest ships in the NFL. He’s drawn high praise from his players for a crisp, efficient, and well-planned practice regimen. A friend of mine works for the Cowboys’ and he managed to slip out one of Coach Phillips’ itineraries from a recent practice:

8:00AM: Still sleeping.

9:45AM: Enter practice. Make sure the guys are running. Hard.

10:00AM: Meetings. The coordinators run these. Usually a good time to slip out and catch a movie. You know what….yeah! Maybe I will catch a flick.

11:15AM: “1 adult for the Tale of Despereaux, please.”

2:00PM: Have the guys run some plays.

2:35PM: Nap.

3:00PM: Dream about dinosaurs.

3:15PM: Don’t you hate it when you wake up from a nap, and you still feel tired? Plus you’ve got a headache and a cotton mouth, for some reason.

3:30PM: Have the guys lift weights, but not too much. We don’t want anybody getting hurt out there.

3:45PM: Call the Giants and give them a big hearty “You’re welcome!” for allowing them to win the Super Bowl last year when it was so clearly yours to win.

4:00PM: Have daily contest with offensive line to see who can get the most Oreos in their mouth.

4:15PM: While the coordinators and position coaches watch game film, continually think to yourself how much you’d rather be watching Looney Tunes.

4:30PM: Slip out to Best Buy to look at HD TVs.

5:15PM: Cancel practice so the linemen can help you move the TV you just bought.

5:30PM: Meet with reporters. Make sure to repeatedly mumble about nothing being wrong with your team. Get indignant when anyone insists that things might not be going well.

6:00PM: Cake!

There you have it. I think all of America is thinking that Coach Phillips, or as he’s known to his players, “The Drill Sergeant,” will guide his team to the playoffs tomorrow.

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