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My Last Name is Eltringham

June 25, 2008


Pronounced as it’s spelled. El-tring-ham. People always mess it up, though. I’ve heard things like Ellingram…good attempt, I guess….Ectington…where’d that C come from…Etraham…all those letters in the middle are weird! Take them away…and Ellington….the great grandson of Duke, maybe?

Here are some I’ve never heard, but wish I had. If you’re going to mess it up, go all out and try one of these:

*Mike Elk-lodge-stan
*Mike Elf-Drink-Tan
*Mike Elderly-Kringle-Cam
*Mike Ham-Dram-Stool
*Mike Elton-John-Wishes-His-Name-Was-Pam
*Mike Eltring-Flim-Flam-Wham-Blam-Sam-Bam-Cunningham (Sandler respect)
*Mike Ellafitzgerald
*Mike Elder-Wand-Pwned-Voldemort, Man
*Mike Smish-smashioes
*Mike El-Let-Me-Get-a-Moment-of-Silence-for-9/11-Right-Quick
*Mike Rubber Band Man, Wild as the Taliban/9 in My Right, 45 in My Other Hand/Who I’m Is?

When you mess up my name, at least do it big. A wise man, and I believe this was FDR, once said: Big shit popping…little shit stopping. Good night and good luck.

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3 Comments leave one →
  1. jake permalink
    June 26, 2008 2:30 pm

    I’m sorry.
    I thought I got it right, but there was that moment of hesitation, that one nanosecond pause of labor which demeaned us both.

    I’m ‘a call you Paddington.

  2. Greg permalink
    August 8, 2008 10:14 pm

    Hey Mike, I just had one more Eltringham f*ck up to add to your blog. Now that we share the same last name, I have experienced the multitude of mispronunciations of Eltringham. By far the funniest one came from an 8 year old in my summer school class. This kid, who attends another school, raises his hand and simultaneously says, “Ms. Electric Ham?” After opening my mouth and contemplating for a brief moment- this kid goes to another school and I will probably never see him again after the next couple of days- I decided on “Yes, what can I help you with?”
    I don’t know about you, but I sure am looking forward to the other mispronunciations that will inevitably follow this one. At least most of the mispronunciations I encounter come from 3rd graders.

  3. Mike Eltringham permalink
    August 9, 2008 12:39 pm

    My senior year of high school, Mr. Rothell used to call me Electric Ham! Maybe they’re related or something.

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